The Voices We Miss
Not everyone who needs help asks for it. Some of us whisper. Some of us disappear. This is about how we build systems that listen better, not just louder.
I’ve Been in the Room and Still Felt Invisible
After the crisis, the space was full: support teams, intake forms, resources. Yet I found myself wondering: How many of us were actually seen? I didn’t need more pamphlets; I needed a pause, a name spoken with care, someone willing to ask, “Are you okay?”
I’ve walked through that gap as someone with lived experience and now as someone working within the system. I’ve learned what gets missed when “help” looks like process and not presence.
We Miss Who Doesn’t Speak First
What I’ve observed: when focus stays on the loudest needs, we overlook the deepest ones.
Some people don’t show up to the vigil.
Some families vanish after initial outreach.
Some say, “I’m fine,” but disappear quietly.
Not because they don’t need help, but because help often didn’t feel possible. Trauma is messy, complex to name, and rarely linear. But if we don’t design for that experience, we miss care entirely.
You Don’t Need a New Department, Just a Shift in Posture
Here’s something real: you can begin meaningful change today, without new budgets or committees—just a different posture.
Audit the Room
Ask:
Who didn’t return after week one?
Whose grief wasn’t represented in our design?
What would make them feel safe walking in?
This isn’t about guilt—it’s about awareness.
De-center the Script
Instead of “How are you doing today?”, try:
“What kind of support feels manageable right now—even if it’s small?”
That change shifts the dynamic from performance to permission. It tells people: you don’t have to fit a box to exist here.
Build Gentle Feedback Loops
Bring people with lived experience into design—not just evaluation.
Pay them. Listen deeply. Revise based on their insight.
You don’t have to bring everyone into the room—but design like you did.
Why It Matters
After disasters, around 30–40% of people show signs of PTSD, anxiety, or depression (National Library of Medicine). Unknown to many, an average of 24–29% of trauma-focused treatment participants drop out early across settings due to intolerance, stigma, or lack of trust (trauma-focused therapy dropout rates).
That means many never get to complete the healing they sought, and systems lose credibility when people don’t feel safe engaging.
This Is the Work We Can Do
I don’t have all the answers, and I don’t think perfection is the goal. What matters is presence. Listening when nobody is shouting. Honoring when people are quiet. Building systems that say: “You’re seen—even in your silence.”
Want Support Shifting Toward Trust‑Centered Healing?
Download a free resource from JG CoLaboratory
Choose the toolkit that matches where you are:
Community Healing Starter Kit
Crisis to Connection Framework
JG CoLab Starter Kit
🎙️ Invite this work into your agency or team
I offer lived‑experience-informed keynotes, trainings, and consultations for organizations ready to lead with empathy and intention.
